Journal Entry 103: DECOMPRESSING

The dictionary lists the definition of decompress as "to release or reduce the physical pressure on something or to have the physical pressure released or reduced".  Is also means 'to relax".

I learned from dealing with my father years ago that you need to take time to relax.  I didn't do enough of that in 2007 and almost had a breakdown in 2008.  To do this care-giving thing you have to acknowledge your tools and use them.   From there you have to take time to decompress.

Even with Mom being in the nursing home I still have to prepare my apartment for her eventual arrival, get her paperwork together for Medicaid, visit her, try and keep up with her progress, go to work and keep up with my own life.  And in visiting Mom I have to pay attention to things in the nursing home while observing Mom to see what she needs help with.  There is more involved in my dealings with her and I am certain other people have a larger grocery list.  This is why it is important that you take time to decompress.

During the week my day starts roughly around 6 in the morning.  Between 7 and 9 I am commuting to work.  From 9-6:30 I am physically at work.  From 7 and 9 that evening I am in commute home, occasionally stopping to get groceries.  Sometimes I may get home a little after 8.  It is safe to say 9:00.  From there I have to eat and prepare for my next day.  I will go to bed somewhere between midnight and 1. In the four unaccounted hours I have to do what I can after I eat.  This would include making calls or texts, personal stuff, cleaning, etc.  Most of the time I just vegetate or decompress.   I won't look at the phone.  In fact my ringer stays off.  I will text or IM you.  I don't even write.  I may play MLB-The Show.  I have to do something to recharge my batteries.  Saturdays and Sundays aren't much better except I don't have to go to a job I don't care for. There are down sides.  I don't return many calls.  If you don't text me I probably will not respond.  I will take an occasional trip to Washington DC or Philadelphia for a day.  It is how I keep sane though.

As I am writing this I am on AMTRAK going back to New York.  I had to go to Florida to get clothes for my mother and tend to some other business for her.  I always take the train back.  It's relaxing.

I am ranting right now but I needed to let it be known the importance of taking time for yourself.  Decompress.