JOURNAL ENTRY 59: Not quite there yet

My godson moved out recently so this is the first time I have had my apartment to myself.  Dad passed away March 2011 and my godson's mother stayed with me on and off until she got on her feet.  Then my godson moved in after being at the mercy of unscrupulous people.  One day I will get into the apartment situation in New York City and how expensive it is.  People illegally  rent out rooms in their houses and apartments.  Most of the time you can't even use the address for your mail.  But that is another story for another day.  The point of this blog entry is that my godson moved out after being here for a couple of years.  And that adventure (not really a bad one) is the topic of another entry sometime in the future.

After Dad passed away I never truly had the opportunity to thoroughly clean the apartment.  Heck, we had papers  and...things all over while he was alive. When he passed I got rid of a few items, primarily some clothes ( I am still trying to find a charitable organization to give the coats to).    Most of the things here I didn't throw away or even look at with the exception of financial documents.  I JUST started doing that this weekend. 

I found that going through y father's belongings was painful a few years ago and it still stings now.  In fact I just came across a letter I wrote to Dad back in 1975 followed by a letter I wrote in 1973.  I had to put in down.  Those will be placed in a special box until I am ready to read them.    All this just helps me realize again that I am really still not ready to go through his belongings. 

I thought about it before but I am really understanding now that I have been off the grid since 2011.  I was never on the radar to start off with.  Dad was the main one to call and keep up with people.  I didn't think it was possible but I have gone even further into the shadows.  It's not something I wanted to do, it is something that just seemed to happen.  Once I get my living conditions in order I am going to slowly step out of this cave.

ELDER CARE INFO: Transferring a house

I am looking into this more.  I can only presume that each state will have its own laws regarding Medicaid and the transfer of a house (check out the links for general information). 

https://www.caring.com/questions/transfer-of-property-prior-to-entering-nursing-home

http://www.nytimes.com/2005/01/02/realestate/02home.html?_r=0

JOURNAL ENTRY 58: Effing up

It's only four months into the year and I am screwing up on at least one of my resolutions; the one to write a blog entry once a week.

To be totally honest my mind has not been on writing lately.  There are times during the year  I deal a little ore with Florida issues as well as work related stuff and I don't have the focus to write.  The past month was one of those times.

Most recently Mom was diagnosed with an infection and was prescribed two antibiotics.  Medications and my mother do not always go hand in hand so that brought on immediate anxiety.  I am told weekly that she does not drink enough water so there goes another anxiety attack.    Thank God I have a therapist or I would probably go mad from a lack of venting.

I may amend the resolution to writing twice a month but first I will see how the personal life goes.

JOURNAL ENTRY 57

It's official.  I visit Mom on Mother's Day and I come back to New York the following weekend.  And while I WISH I could say that I am just going down for Mother's Day I will attempt to attend  to her hearing issues.  Her hearing aid will need to be serviced and she may need to see her ear doctor as well. Then there's the caregiver issue as well as certain legal forms, so as usual it will not be a vacation.

And I am not telling Mom that I am coming down until the day I get there.    I have gotten complaints that my mother gets mean just before I come down.  I am not sure if this is because I am coming down or if there are just too many women in that house at times.