JOURNAL ENTRY #108

I follow up with Leon from Congressman Beneditto's office tomorrow.  I am praying for positive results.  I do have a small backup plan in case I reach another roadblock.  I actually have two plans.  One would be to use my work benefits to get a hold of a low cost attorney or apply for guardianship. At the very least her pension came through so I can get a few more things for the apartment in anticipation of her coming.

I visited Mom today.  The past three visits were really good.  She was alert.  I brought some music with me and let her listen for a few minutes and she loved it.

I sat down and wrote out what I am doing and for the month of May I have 22 tasks.  This is a combination of my tasks and Mom's tasks.     Some cost money and others time.  I think I can get a little more than half completed.

JOURNAL ENTRY 107

I have an appointment to see Congressman Benedetto this Monday.  I made the appointment this past Thursday.

I started off trying to see Congressman Engel.  I stopped by his office around 9:30 and an overly aggressive older African-American woman asked what I needed.  After interrupting me a few times I explained to her about the pension situation and first she told me to get a lawyer. she told me that the pension issue is a state one and that I should see Senator Benedetto.  I walked a few feet to the state senator's office. An older Black lady fielded my question and referred me to their office manager, a young Black guy maybe a little younger than me.  He politely let me know that they were really busy dealing with Coop City residents and getting their income affidavits notarized.  He made the appointment for Monday after asking me a few questions.  he didn't interrupt me.

I am praying he can be helpful.

JOURNAL ENTRY 106

These days, I feel like either I am putting out several small fires or like I have planted several seeds and can only properly attend to a few.

I am dealing with:

Mom, 

The Nursing Home

Mom's Social Security
The house
Mom's outstanding finances

Mom's pension

MY finances
MY physical health

My job
My mental health

My day to day life

And this is just off the top of my head.

JOURNAL ENTRY 105: The Future

I have NEVER been extremely optimistic over my future.  Up until about 2006 I was at best indifferent about it, meaning I never gave it much though.  Try and live as healthy as possible and that's it.  After 2006 I am not very optimistic about old age.  To be honest I don't really want it.  I will be content if I live to be just 70.

My reasons are difficult to articulate.  You would have to have walked in my shoes to understand even a little why I feel this way.  I will try to explain just a little though.

Dad really started to show his age mid to late 2007.  The specific even t that told me he was having issues came after he left the apartment and brought the police claiming the apartment was robbed.  From then came the sundowning and hallucinations.  His neurologist diagnosed him with Alzheimer's Disease.  I didn't think his situation was necessarily Alzheimer's but I knew there was some type of dementia.  In hindsight I don't think Dad's journey was hideous. He cooperated with me for the most part and I was able to leave him home for a few hours.  In the beginning I was able to travel to Florida and keep phone contact with him.  We had joint accounts and gave me no grief over handling business.  I made sure he made his appointments.  The worst he did was not eat like he should and he had that issue before the dementia.  With him the worst came if he was sick.  He had pneumonia in 2008 and had the fall in 2010.  I had to make  sure he was taken care of wherever he went.  I remember when he got admitted to Halifax just before Christmas 2010 in Florida.  The nurses were told he had dementia.  Still one evening I visited him and this one nurse freaked out and said my father tried to assault her.  Turns out the lights were off and she entered the room, NEVER ANNOUNCED HERSELF, touched Dad and he grabbed her, firmly.  Next thing I knew Halifax was trying to discharge my father after only two days.  He had a broken arm and was extremely confused in part because of the environment and the medication and of course his broken arm.  Another nurse intervened but I later realized that it was because of legal issues and not out of compassion.  He stayed another day and went to a rehab place now known as Solaris.

Dad of course never returned to his apartment and I had to watch his progress until he eventually passed away that following March.

Mom's journey has been a lot different.  She is an alpha female and is always in charge.  She showed signs of her dementia a couple of years ago but I am thinking she was going through it a few years before and it gradually got worse.  Her reasoning was changing since 2006 but I chalked it up to old age.  she is less reasonable than Dad.  She made out a will, a living will and health proxy years ago but financial stuff wasn't done until a couple of years ago.  She may lose her house now because she didn't transfer it to me.  I did it with the power of attorney.

I see how the "system" is wired against people.  POA's , health proxy and living wills are nice but occasionally useless.  In Mom's case the POA is useless in regards to her social security.

But I see how it sucks to even get sick at a young age.  My stint in the hospital two years ago showed me that.  So if I get to be 75 years old and get sick, the way things are now I could get the wrong treatment, suffer and die.  While being treated I can be fed food I clearly noted I am allergic to, suffer and die.  If I get dementia I may go to a nursing home, be abused, suffer and die........just before the state sucks my assets dry faster than a crack whore for a fix.  Personally I have not been fond of any of the nursing homes I have been to aside from Beth Abraham and they were fair.  If I stay home I am in danger.  If I stay at my house I may lose that.  There is even more but right now I am not even in the mood to go through it.  A long time ago I thought I would take care of myself to be able to live to be 80 or 90.  Now I see living that long as a way to fatten someone else's pocket while I am barely able to appreciate life.  Let me go at 70.

JOURNAL ENTRY 104 The journey so far

The last time I wrote I mentioned that Mom was at Workman's Circle for rehab and was recently being discharged.  While the facility can't just kick her out they did end her Medicare and now they can charge her privately since she does not have Medicaid yet. I am working on the slow and painful process of Medicaid. Meanwhile I am also filing appeals for the Medicare early discharge.  This also includes a complaint filed with New York State Health and Hygiene. 

So far I am about to start the third level of appeals.  Based on what Workman's Circle doctors put in Mom's medical files she is walking 30 feet with minimal assistance.  I was there last Saturday(4/7) and she wouldn't get out of be and walked while being held up by the therapist.  And she can't eat on her own. 

The first level of appeal went to a group called Livanta.  I won the first week (shortly after April 1).  Workman's Circle never supplied the medical records.  They immediately filed again to discharge Mom and I again appealed and Workman's Circle won that.  I appealed that to a group called C2C and they found in the Home's favor.  Now I have to go to the net level.

NOW I have to fight with NYCERS, the people in charge of my mother's pension.  Every so often they send a letter they want notarized.  I guess it is to make sure the person getting the check is still alive.  Back in September I got Power of Attorney over Mom. Good thing as she is now showing signs of dementia.  Turns out NYCERS legal refuses to acknowledge the POA.  According to them even though the form was notarized and filed in a FLORIDA COURT and approved, Mom didn't sign in front of the notary, which she did, and they are forcing me to refile using their form.  Problem is Mom is in no position now to do this. Mind you Mom did sign in front of the notary public.  Florida would not have accepted the form otherwise.  All of these roadblocks are from people who are supposedly looking out for the best interest of the elderly.  So now not only can I not speak on behalf of my mother but her money may be suspended.

Social Security  is a nightmare almost as bad.  Because of Mom's mental state I had to file a form (I will remember it later) to handle her business there.  Social Security won't even acknowledge the POA.  Of course I need Social Security and NYCERS  in order to get Medicaid for my mother.  For those very few reading this Medicaid will not authorize without current address.  Specifically they will not pay for Mom in New York if her check goes to Florida.  I cannot change that yet.  And of course she may only be getting half of her money because of NYCERS.

In all of this er bank was no problem.  They acknowledged the POA.

For now I am at a major roadblock.   The only thing I can think of is to contact a congressman and ask them to intervene in the pension issue.  Meanwhile I will have to let Mom stay at Workman's Circle and accumulate bills.